back to work this week...real work....and the balance is eluding me. i left in tears today. i was always passionate about the work i do before i became a mother. i do therapy based on applied behavioral analysis with children on the autism spectrum. i left to stay home with A and now that my husband has been out of work so long i am back in the world of autism. and it was so hard this week.
it was hard to leave A when i want to be with him, hard to be with a sick baby who is the same age as A, hard to not let the anger i have about having to work overtake me. where is the balance?
i love what i do as work but there is a strong urge to simply be a mother. the feeling that everyday i am missing time with A is heartbreaking. will i ever get used to this feeling?