Wednesday, September 29, 2010


today was the first day in quite a few that the anxiety was lifted. good news yesterday and oiur life is slowly coming back together.... who could ask for more?
i have noticed that after times of intense anxiety in my life, my other senses become heightened when the anxiety dissipates.
today i caught myself marveling at the colors of a red leaf, enjoying the fall breeze on my skin, stopping eating once i realized i was full, driving home excited to see my husband, to hug and kiss him...
i am reminded that there is always a balance to life. when something goes up something else comes down. there is also purpose to the trials we go through. sometimes it takes me only a moment to see the purpose and sometimes it takes years for the true purpose to materialize.
i am thankful today that my life is full of riches....the love of a husband, the miracle of a son, the families i know and love, the friends i know and love, the world around me....there is always happiness

Sunday, September 12, 2010

the past few weeks have been difficult. my husband was laid off again and we are simmering in the aftermath. i am not willing to let our life fall apart over this again. i know we are much smarter going into this than the last time around but i am fearful none the less.
i am back to work part time, and my hubby is back to being a stay at home dad. this is not what we want and it just plain sucks but that's what we have to do right now. i am lucky i only have to work part time and i am lucky we had enough time to get on the right track before he was let go again. i know he will get called back eventually. the first time this happend 6 years ago he was out 6 months. then it happened in 2007 and he was out for over two years.
all i can do is learn from our mistakes, try not to make new ones and move along as best i can.
but these times are trying and i feel weaker with every step....